There are huge differences between confident men and insecure men. What are some things confident men will never do? Here are 8 things you’ll never see a confident masculine do. Maybe you’ll recognize some of these in yourself or people around you.
8 Things confident masculine men never do:
- Get angry over rejection
- Always trying to one-up others
- Always trying to please others
- Not playing to win
- Putting others down
- Constantly self-deprecating humor
- Having bad posture
- Trying to be invisible
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1. Get angry over rejection
Men have to do the hunting. This is true for many things. For most people there are very few (good) things in life that come to you without asking for it.
Now the main thing men think about when I say hunting is women. And that is also where most weak men have the strongest reaction to rejection. They get angry because they think they deserve “the girl” because they are “nice guys”. When she doesn’t agree with that, they get angry.
Confident men won’t get angry over rejection. Why not? Confident men are attractive. Attractive men won’t have any problems getting “the girl”. And if they get rejected, they are confident enough to not let it bother them and move on.
2. Always trying to one up others
You probably know someone that does this (or maybe you recognize it in yourself). The person that always has to tell a better story, buy a better car, bigger house, etc. than people around them.
While being competitive isn’t a bad thing, always doing this isn’t really good competition anymore. It often comes from a place of insecurity. To them it feels like a personal attack if someone else has/does something that is better or cooler than him.
Insecure men try to make up for their insecurity by trying to show off whatever superficial thing they possess. This comes from the belief that having “better” things will make people like you better and give you status. While having a higher status might help you feel more confident, always showing off isn’t likely to have people giving you that status though.
3. Always try to please others
Another thing insecure men tend to do, is to always please others. People that always please others at a cost to themselves are often insecure.
Always trying to please others means you’re not doing things for yourself. At times you have to value yourself enough to make your own choices and piss someone off in the process. You won’t get out of life what you want if you always do what other people like.
You’ll live someone else’s life instead of your own.
4. Not playing to win
Confidence, in part, comes from taking action to succeed in life. Insecure men don’t think they can win in life. They think everything is stacked against them or they aren’t good enough to get things done themselves.
They are just playing life in a way they won’t lose. They’re not playing to win.
Insecure men are usually quite risk averse. They want to prevent losing much more than taking a risk to win. There are situations where this is wise but, if you do this in everything, you’re not going to get the results you want in life.
Since winning helps you become more confident, living life in this way, it’ll never help you become more confident. This creates a vicious circle of insecurity.
Living life this way is also likely to make you bitter and feel like you didn’t get what you deserve/could have.
5. Putting down others
One of the most irritating traits any person can have is always putting down other people. Everyone is always doing things wrong. He knows better and everyone should listen to him. All other people are stupid.
By putting down others, a person tries to; A: make himself feel superior B: Make others feel insecure as well.
Most of the time, other people around him will pick up on this behavior pretty quickly however. People around him will start isolating him which in turn makes the insecure guy believe that other people are all bad even more.
6. Constantly using self-deprecating humor
The use of self-deprecating humor isn’t necessarily a sign of insecurity. At times it can be funny and a sign of knowing your own weaknesses
Where it gets problematic is when a person uses it all. The. Time. The point where it starts feeling more like self-flagellation than humor is where it goes wrong. There is a difference between knowing your weaknesses and using humor to cover up you hate everything about yourself.
People that do this think that, by putting everything they don’t like about themselves out in the open, other people will have pity on them. It can also be seen as a preemptive strike against possible attacks. If you make comments about yourself, you control the time, place and severity of the comment.
7. Having bad posture
How often do you see a confident, successful man with really bad posture? Almost never. Having confidence will make people stand up straighter and have better posture in general.
Insecure men will unconsciously have worse posture because they don’t want to draw attention to themselves. That leads into the following point;
8. Trying to be invisible
Secure men won’t always try to be the center of attention but, they certainly won’t try to be invisible in social situations.
It’s the same reason why insecure men have bad posture. They don’t want any possibility of attention or possible conflict because they are sure they’ll come off worse or they don’t know how to deal with it.
Also, insecure men try to be invisible because they can’t believe someone would want to have any interaction with them.
Want more posts about masculinity? Check out one of these posts:
- How to look more masculine [7 Tips]
- What makes a man masculine?
- How to get a more masculine voice
- 8 things confident men never do.
Hi there. I’m BetterDaily. I’m a man in his early thirties that likes to travel, ride motorcycles, work out and write. Usually I write about men, things related to masculinity and things men like. Teacher by day, blogger by night.